Bullying In Schools
Violence and Harassment Prevention Strategies
Adult action can improve school safety
Bullying in schools interferes with learning and with the sense of
safety and well-being of all students. Adults can take action to
help create a safer learning environment. They can:
1. Address Bullying — It's Not Harmless
Bullying behavior--whether it's through threatening words or
gestures, physically hurting, name-calling, mimicking, harassing, or
shunning (isolating someone)--is a destructive force in the lives of
too many kids. Being the victim of a bully is an attack on a young
person's self esteem and joy in life. Being the bully allows a child
to build behavior that will be destructive socially and professionally
later in life. Witnessing bullying creates an upsetting distracting
environment in which to play and work and learn. Bullying in schools
affects all the children, not just the targeted victims.
Potential bullies, victims, and witnesses can learn to be assertive
rather than aggressive or passive in dealing with problems that they
experience directly or that they see happening.
2. Make bullying against the rules
Bullying in schools needs to be clearly against the rules.
Make sure that your child's school has a clear written Violence and
Harassment Prevention Policy that everyone agrees to uphold. Tune in
when kids are acting upset with each other and help them learn skills
for handling conflict. Set an example for your children by not
allowing people to bully you and by exercising the self-control
necessary not to bully others. At home, work at stopping bullying
behavior with the same commitment that you would use in stopping
someone from throwing all the dishes on the floor and breaking them.
3. Teach kids to act aware and confident
Bullies pick on kids who act scared, oblivious, or defensive. An
alert, assertive attitude can help possible victims and witnesses stop
most bullying before it starts.
4. Teach kids target denial skills
Target denial is an official martial arts technique that means,
"Don't be there!" Target denial means not giving a bully a
physical advantage by being too close. For example, kids can move away
from someone who they know is a problem. Target denial means not
giving a bully an emotional handle. One technique is to leave by
smiling and waving and saying cheerfully, "No, thanks!" very
calmly and sincerely instead of acting scared or angry.
5. Teach kids the power of words
In order to address bullying in schools, parents and teachers can
teach children how to protect themselves from words and also by using
words. Kids tell us that trying to "just ignore it when someone
says something mean to you" doesn't really work. Stop serious
name-calling with the same commitment that you would use to stop
serious hitting. Teach kids to protect themselves from hurting words
by imagining throwing them into a garbage can instead of taking them
inside their hearts or their heads. Teach kids not to let insults,
rude behavior, or guilt trips trigger them into feeling intimidated or
emotionally coerced by a bully. Kids need to learn how not to let what
others say or do control their choices. They also need to learn how
not to behave in emotionally damaging ways towards others. Teach kids
how to set clear strong verbal boundaries in a respectful, assertive
way with people they know.
6. Teach kids to defend themselves physically
To be effective in using other bully prevention tactics, kids need
to know that they can protect themselves physically. As a last resort,
kids need to know if and when and how they can hurt someone to stop
that person from hurting them.
7. Teach kids to get help
Be someone your kids can come to with their problems without fear
of you overreacting or belittling them or lecturing or getting mad at
them. Even if the issues they bring might seem trivial to you, these
issues usually seem big to them. Most of the time, kids just need
someone to listen so they won't feel alone. Being able to talk about
problems can help a child figure out what to do and put things into
perspective. Having our kids in the habit of talking to us can also
alert us to more serious issues.
8. Give kids the chance to practice
Bullying in schools can often be managed with personal safety
skills, and kids learn more by actually doing than by being told what
to do. Programs such as KIDPOWER and TEENPOWER give kids the chance to
develop skills that can change their lives in a few short hours. We
also offer programs for adults on how to present and practice these
skills with their children.
©
Copyright 2004. All rights reserved.
A publication of KIDPOWER TEENPOWER FULLPOWER International
www.kidpower.org
831-426-4407
Permission to reproduce granted with copyright notice and contact
information
at beginning and end of each article used.
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