Personal Safety and Disabilities:
SELF-PROTECTION TIPS FOR PEOPLE WITH DIFFERENT ABILITIES
Personal safety and disabilities – This combination of issues
often leads to assumptions about helplessness that can cause people
with disabilities to worry that they do not have any way to protect
themselves from an attack. Our experience in teaching personal
safety to people of many different abilities and life challenges is
that what is most important is to focus on how to use what you CAN
do to keep yourself safe.
Unfortunately, if you have a disability that is obvious to other
people, you might be more likely to be attacked. Some attackers
target people who seem more vulnerable because they are disabled.
The following ideas from KIDPOWER TEENPOWER FULLPOWER can help you
keep yourself safe most of the time whether you are large or small,
disabled or not, old or young, female or male.
In order to avoid drawing a potential attacker’s attention,
project an aware confident attitude. This will prevent most
attackers from actually selecting you as their victim. Make sure
your body language and attitude let people know that you know they
are there without acting afraid or challenging them. Move as if you
are sure about where you are going. Sit or stand as upright as you
can.
Instead of staring at someone aggressively or looking away
passively, glance briefly towards the person and then continue on
your way. Even if you can't see, you can still turn your face
towards people so they understand that you are aware of their
presence. Projecting an attitude of awareness and confidence can
overcome someone’s first impression that you are probably an easy
target.
Take charge of the space around you so that a potential attacker
does not have the opportunity to get close to you. If you are in an
isolated place, move away from people who seem like they might be a
threat to you. The "I'm OK, You're Ok" approach works most
of the time. Just leave cheerfully and get to a safe place. If
someone is being rude, or calling you to come over, you could act as
if there is no problem - smile, wave and say something neutral like,
"Hi" or "No thanks" or "Sorry, No.”
If someone starts confronting you and you can't just leave, take
charge by setting a boundary. Put your hands up in front of you like
you are making a wall and get yourself into balance. Tell the person
politely and assertively what you want. If someone is being
predatory, make it clear that you are not an easy victim. "Stop
right there.... Turn around and leave.” If someone is being
competitive, make it clear that you are not a challenge, “I don’t
want any trouble. I just want to leave.”
Be sure you use a calm, firm, loud voice and strong, neutral body
language - without fists waving at someone’s face and without
shrinking away. Adapt these skills with both your
personal safety and disabilities taken into account. A one-handed
boundary can be just as effective as a two-handed boundary. Simple
short words, such as “Stop… Leave now…. Leave,” or even just
“NO!” can be very effective as long as you look and sound like
you mean it.
Know where safety is and how to get help. Have your cell phone
programmed to the local police, who often respond more quickly than
a general emergency number. Always have a plan for where you would
go if you have a problem. Be willing to make a scene and order
bystanders to call the police or come to your aid. Be willing to
embarrass, inconvenience, or offend other people in order to protect
your well-being.
Know how to set clear boundaries with people you know. Most of
the people who bother others are people they know. Be prepared to
tell people you care about what is and is not okay with you even if
it hurts their feelings or makes them upset. Your safety and
self-esteem are worth causing anyone inconvenience, embarrassment,
or offence. Problems should not be secrets, so talk issues over with
people you trust.
Identify and take the power out of your triggers. Triggers are
thoughts or words or feelings or other behavior that cause us to
explode with feelings. When we are exploding with feelings, we
cannot think clearly. Common triggers are bad words and foul
language, insults, scary words and threats, or confusing words and
feeling sorry for someone. Make sure what you do is a decision
based on what is really happening, rather than an automatic reaction
or a habit.
As a last resort, know how to forcefully defend yourself.
Practice with both your personal safety and disabilities taken into
account so that you can quickly access your own personal strengths
and resources. Most attacks are stopped by just one strong
move, but be prepared to keep fighting until you feel it is safe to
leave and get help. Strong moves can be: yelling at bystanders for
help, telling someone to STOP, hitting or kicking someone. Whatever
you do, sound, look, and act as if you MEAN IT.
Developing skills for personal safety and disabilities includes
looking at ALL of your tools, including your body, your voice, and
other tools you have, such as a wheelchair. The basic strategy
is to use the parts of your body you can move as well as your
wheelchair or walking aid as weapons and the vulnerable parts of an
attacker's body as targets. If you keep yelling as you are fighting,
you will have more power and other people will be more likely to
notice. If you are attacked from the front you can yell NO! and pull
away, strike to the eyes, heel palm hit to the face, knee strike to
groin, kick or slap to the groin, slam your wheelchair into the
shins or knees of the attacker. People who are practicing skills
with their personal safety and disabilities in mind can discover
power and choices they didn’t know they had until they practiced!
When someone attacks from behind you can yell NO! and lower your
center of gravity, stomp on or run over attackers foot with your
wheelchair, slap to the groin, grab and squeeze testicles, elbow
strike to the solar plexus, head or groin or slam your wheelchair
into the attackers shins, groin or midsection. The same strategies
usually work even if the attacker has a weapon, or you end up on the
ground, or there are two or more attackers. You are more important
than your property so we do NOT recommend that you fight over your
stuff. Just hand it over and say, "Take it. It's yours."
Our experts say that your risk of injury goes up if you fight to
keep a robber from taking your possessions. However, statistically
your risk of injury goes down if you fight to keep an attacker from
hurting you or taking you away to a more private place.
Leave if you can. Yell for help. Fight if you have to. If you
cannot get away right away, keep looking for a new chance to get
away. Instead of freezing, pretend to give up so that the attacker
will relax and then leave or start resisting the instant you have an
opening to do so.
No matter how the situation ends, any confrontation is not over
until you have gotten help. Even when you get away from someone, it
is normal to feel shaky and even ashamed. It is scary to encounter
someone who has an intention to harm you. For some reason, people
often blame themselves for being attacked instead of being proud of
themselves for escaping from the attack. Find people you trust
and ask for support to help you recover from this experience.
Personal safety and disabilities means adapting how best you can
implement the basic self protection strategies of being aware,
taking charge, and getting help. Practicing these skills helps to
build your confidence. Remember that the fact that someone
decides to attack you is not your fault. You have the right and the
responsibility to protect yourself and to insist on help and support
after you have gotten away.
